04 June 2008

Eating lunch alone

Part of moving...the biggest part...is making friends. It's hard to show up mid term in a high school. Darn hard. Understand this: These people are afraid of what they don't know...and that is you. Every Brat knows what it's like to eat lunch alone. Out of shyness, we try to come off like we want to eat alone. And that's when it starts. The misconception by other students that we're full of ourselves. Here's a clue for them. We'll eat with anyone! Anyone! That ain't being full of yourself. That's just not knowing what to do.

You can do one of three things:

1-Make no effort and continue to eat alone. The results? You'll grow up being very comfortable eating alone. This appears to be, from what I've read, only second to fear of public speaking. I'm very comfortable speaking in public and eating alone. So, you know what I did.

2-Eat with anyone who comes along and joins you at the lunch table. I did this as well. Not that I had any choice. You will then meet those unfortunates no one else will eat with. This only gets very bad for you.

3-Grab your courage and introduce yourself to people who look somewhat normal. First time I did it -- I was shot down. I crawled back in my cave and wonder of wonders, I tried again. Met the most wonderful kids in the world. We're still friends. And I'm old.

You want life time friends? Hang it out there. You wanna meet wack jobs hitting 12 on the koo-koo meter, they'll come to you. You wanna be comfortable eating alone...do nothing. But you're a Brat. I know you. You'll never do nothing.

"If you want to catch little fish, you can stay in the shallow water. But if you want to catch the big fish, you've got to go deeper." David Lynch, From the book, "Catching The Big Fish" Where was this guy when I was growing up?


Easy and Elegant Life said...

Wow. This is a very intense and personal site.

Funny, I was just thinking that this is the 7th Independence Day we've spent in this house. That's a record. I suppose that's civilian life, but it sure is strange. And we quit being military in 1976. Although my folks bought a new house in 1983, a year before I went to college. Wish I had the wealth of photos that you do.

One of the last things my Dad asked me was to not join the military. He said it had changed too much. And then he added, "but if you must, become a Marine." Never made it, just didn't have the intestinal fortitude to try. Impressive that you made that decision (enlisting????!!!)

You've left comments on my blog before and I'm sorry I haven't made it over here or to the Trad before today. It's been a ride.

Hope your father is doing well.

Happy Independence Day.

tintin said...

Thank you for visting and your well wishes for my father. My father also tried to keep me from the Army and told me to go Coast Guard but I was Army bound regardless of his advice. The Army was what I knew as a kid. I had no idea what the Coast Guard was all about. With hindsight - - Dad was right.

It's great to hear from another Brat.

Ben said...

God bless imperfect fathers, because if God only blessed the perfect ones, there wouldn't be any to bless.

It is important at our age to reflect on our fathers. Wise of you to start this blog, Tintin. I should venture a comment about mine on my blog, which is often about fathers and sons and wives, anyway.

Son of an aviator here, and friend to many brats at my prep school. In Honolulu, we had them all, Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marine.

Ben said...

... oh, and best wishes to your father and family.