27 April 2009

I used to know them...

The other home

Like many brats -- when it was time to settle down it was time to find someone who was settled. A good looking crowd they are. All my ex-wife's family. Third generation natives of Chicago's North Shore. The photographer announced the wife's family picture and as my new Irish Catholic relations came from every direction one guest laughed, "When does Rose Kennedy come rolling out in her wheel chair?" I thought it was hysterical. Maybe you had to be there.

I didn't think of looking for a family to go with my wife. That wasn't my intent. With hindsight it's easy to see I embraced my new wife's family and home and became a Chicagoan in short order. Much like moving in the Army - - I quickly absorbed everything in my surroundings.

I was married for 13 years to my wife and to these people. I loved them very much but after the divorce, except for four people in this picture, I never saw or heard from them again. In all fairness to them -- I never reached out. I wasn't sure how. They may feel the same way about me.

A couple of friends are going through a divorce and I always think of how sad it is to not only lose your spouse but their family as well. I lost so many friends in the Army after knowing them for a year or two. It's inconceivable to me to lose people you know for 13 years. When asked recently if I knew someone in this picture - - I said, "I used to." What an odd thing to say and yet it's the consistent theme of my life.

4 comments:

victoria thorne said...

i know the feeling

the consistency of the theme is the tough part, isn't it?

lucky, here, in family...and, yet, still (after 20 years in Silicon Valley) not used to NOT moving every three years...strange

look forward to reading the rest, Sir

tintin said...

Thank you for your nice words. I love running into other brats and can't wait to check out all of your blog!

Marilyn said...

I'm an Old Brat -- WWII vintage. My army officer father was send to Korea in 1946 as part of the Occupation. My mother, brother and I joined him. I have a copy of my very own orders from The War Department.
I can relate to everything you and others have said. I have written a book, Once a Brat, published by PublishAmerica, about my experiences as a military brat all over the world in the years following WWII and The Cold War. I'd like to know if you would mention it or post a cover and a short blurb, on your blog? I'll link to your blog, too.
You might get this twice... cranky Internet connection!
Marilyn Celeste Morris

tintin said...

Michelle- That's a very interesting history you have. I'll order your book through Amazon and write a post on it as well. I'll warn you that I don't get a lot of traffic here. Kind'a like an army barracks during Christmas.